Psalm 10 – Psalm 77 – Psalm 13
Lament…………………..do you know about lament?
I really didn’t understand what was meant by lament – at least not for a Christian. Lament according to Webster is the expression of sorrow – the mourning, wailing, crying loudly. But for the Christian, the definition is a bit different.
Here’s where I suggest a very good book on Christian lament. The title? Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy by Mark Vroegop. It’s been an very eye-opening book for me. Let me try to explain why.
The past 2+ years I have been experiencing a different kind of grief – or maybe it would be more accurate to say a different season of grief that now I think is really lament.
The book explains lament way better than I could, so I will use short excerpts from the book.
“Lament is a prayer in pain that leads to trust.”
Lament “usually includes 4 key elements: (1) an address to God, (2) a complaint, (3) a request, and (4) an expression of trust and/or praise.”
“Lament is the honest cry of hurting heart wrestling with the paradox of pain and the promise of God’s goodness.”
So you see, it is different than melting into a bucket of tears, which is what happens to us especially for the first few years………but we all know that this pops up as time goes on. We all know we don’t “get over” grief or completely heal this side of heaven. But, the lion’s share of this happens early. Just an aside – I believe this is God’s grace. How can I say that? I believe if God allowed us to feel the full weight of the pain of grief in the first week or so that we would actually die. I don’t believe our human frame could take it. And so, God allows the buckets for awhile, but then they are more manageable containers. We are able to cry it through, and work through that moment, or that hour, or that difficult day or night. God’s grace. It’s a way He shows His love for us & His compassion.
Back to lament………..so maybe the best way to help you is to be transparent about my lamenting over the recent past, and is still very much present.
It is me asking hard questions that stem from watching others widowed find their second chapter or it might be watching the frightening spiral of culture, our country etc. etc. and realizing I may walk this darkness alone till He returns. And yes – I know I’m not alone when I have God/Jesus/Holy Spirit. Truly, they are the only thing that holds me together sometimes. Dark – it’s so dark, and getting darker by the day.
It’s me wrestling with the “paradox of pain and the promise of God’s goodness.” It’s a word I learned recently. Theodicy. Defense of God’s goodness and omnipotence in view of the existence of evil (Webster)
It’s asking God where my restoration is, when will the intense pain stop, how long Lord? Then when I’m deep in the weeds with this, I think of others whose suffering is physical and unending, and I wonder if I have a leg to stand on in my lament to God. In the end, I believe we all go through crucibles of our own, whether physical or emotional or spiritual. And as Christians, the difference for us is the Rock on which we stand. I must remember that while my feelings are very real, they are often not true. So how can I know??
How we know our feelings aren’t true is to line them up with the Truth of scripture. We don’t have our own truth – there is only one Truth. Our pain, whatever it is, doesn’t get the final word – God does.
The Psalms are so encouraging to me. I believed that’s why it’s the “go to” scripture for anyone experiencing a tough emotion. David lays it all out – over & over again. I love that about him. God had him do that for our benefit. David was a man after God’s own heart, but he still struggled with pain, with theodicy.
Am I rolling out of this lament ? The simple answer is no. I do, however, see God teaching me things. And I know from walking with the Lord for lots of years, He’s got a purpose in my pain. I also know that He loves when I praise Him even when I’m crying and asking questions. I love that about Him. He is my heavenly Father and I can come to Him messy & broken. Good thing, because I am………….alot these days. You too?
Be encouraged friend. Go to the Psalms I listed at the beginning of this post. That’s a great starting point. Keep talking to God. Bring Him your questions, your pain. Ask Him to teach you things through this. Trust Him. Praise Him. Watch what He does. Friend, He is our solid Rock. Everything else is sinking sand. This pain isn’t for nothing. God doesn’t waste anything. Hold onto hope. Hold onto the Savior. Lament it out dear friends…………….
Sending you hugs……………………Peace & Blessings…………